Reflections on Valentine’s Day

Valentine’s Day will be approaching in a few days’ time. For some, especially those who have just found love it would be a day of celebration and making their loved ones feel special. Others, who have been in love for some time, would be a day of marvelling at the fact that merely labelling a day could hike up the price of roses five times over.

For some others still, it would be a day of determination to end their single days, probably furiously scrolling through their Facebook friend lists, phone contact list or hurriedly swiping “Yes” to every Tinder profile they come across, hoping to not be alone on Valentine’s. But in all cases, it’s usually a celebration of love, in a pure and innocent way.

Whatever religious significance St Valentine’s had held, has largely been lost and mutilated along the way. Today, what remains is most probably a flower, card, chocolate and soft toy industry-driven scheme to market their products. Still, many religiously observe this day. The difference being, some like it and mark it in their calendars alongside their partner’s birthday and their anniversaries as “Days to Remember” at the risk of the wrath of their wives or girlfriends.

While some cannot stand it and mark it alongside Mardi Gras and the latest Metallica KL Tour dates as “Days to Oppose” at the risk of the wrath of God. And both sides are terrified for the same understandable reason. When they get angry, hell has been raised and people been subjected to terrible, mind-blowing, and cruel forms of punishment and torture. And I hear God’s punishment is even worse.

Neither do I quite understand the second group’s argument that everything leads to “immorality”, which is basically another word for sex lah. Because even the use of the word “sex” is immoral. Attend a concert, get drunk, have sex. Go for a dinner date, buy her chocolates, get frisky, have sex. Go clubbing, start dancing, have sex .Attend an art exhibition, get bored, have sex. I don’t know which universe these guys get their ideas from but if there is some guru somewhere teaching this, who has actually succeeded in this method of well, getting “some”, I would like to sign up for classes!

And apparently all that sex will only happen in budget hotels. You will never hear of five-star hotels getting raided or having a group of a people chanting religious slogans outside. It’s a bit insulting, really. If a person has blown a few hundred bucks on a concert ticket or a really expensive Valentine’s dinner, I think it’s safe to assume they can afford a proper hotel room.

But I digress.

Anyway, whichever the side of the Valentine’s argument you stand for; in a few days’ time you will see two very different sides of the same Malaysia.

One a modern, progressive Malaysia that doesn’t label everything they see on MTV as vile corrupted values of the West. A Malaysia that is comfortable enough in its own identity to be able to discern for itself what is commercial, corrupted or innocent. These are the people you would see in a few days’ time holding hands and walking in the parks, and having quiet dinners and blushing and remembering their first kisses and reaffirming their commitment for one another.
One that understands love can be a beautiful and sweet thing. That when two people have something going, they believe they can take over the world.

The other is a Malaysia that believes it knows best what God wants for this country. A Malaysia struggling to find its own identity but at the same time in a hurry to impose that yet-to-be-found identity on everyone else. These are the people who would be stalking the first group and depending on whether they fear God’s wrath or the woman partner’s wrath more, either hand over a pamphlet or a full blown lecture on morality and how this isn’t part of our culture.

At the end of the day, all this arguments for or against it is just part of a much larger battle of ideologies to claim the soul of this country. A battle that has been going on for some time now, fuelled by politics and religion. As time progresses, we will likely see more and more things, people, ideas, holidays added to this compendium of contending things that are OK and not OK.

And the possibility is very real that Valentine’s will not be celebrated any more in this country

Till that day comes, let’s have more love! God (and maybe also the women) knows we need it!

Happy Valentine’s Day everyone! – February 10, 2015.

* This is the personal opinion of the writer or publication and does not necessarily represent the views of The Malaysian Insider.