Umno, PAS and Katy Perry

Umno and PAS have a love hate relationship with each other. Umno and PAS also have a love-hate relationship with their partners in their respective coalitions.

To add to the relationship issues, they also now, appear to have a love-hate relationship with non-Muslim voters.

Just like pop singer Jason Derulo is apparently “reminded of a Katy Perry song” every time his “girl gets undressed”, I am reminded of a Katy Perry song every time I read a stark naked, ridiculous statement by either party about, well, us non-Muslims and other minorities. Why do I say that?

‘Cause you’re hot then you’re cold

Before the elections, both sides will try really, really hard to seem inclusive of all races. In February 2013, the prime minister even went to extent of appearing on an ad blitz campaign on several Chinese radio shows, complete with a Chinese name, Mandarin-speaking son and Chinese outfit.

Fast forward one year and a few thousand Chinese votes later, the next Chinese New Year saw a much more subdued Chinese New Year greeting from the PM.

The only memorable thing this year, in fact, was probably the Barisan Nasional open house Yee Sang toss photo featuring the MIC president and his wife wondering where to stick their chopsticks in.

Before the elections as well, PAS was very actively courting the Indian community. Ponggal celebrations, Deepavali open houses, you could find PAS leaders everywhere… then suddenly Thaipusam was being compared to street rallies, and there was a sudden silence as some religious preachers accused Hindu gods of being powerless against floods.

Though against which God(s) doesn’t entirely remain a certainty, as some God(s) were actually reported to like floods as a means of destroying enemies, inspiring awe, wonder, and at least three Hollywood blockbusters in the process.

Hardly a word anymore where there were Indian issues raised, or when a picture of a Hindu God on a mineral water bottle became a national issue.

You’re yes then you’re no

The Herald issue is one of the best examples of this. After years of not having an issue with it, the government, much like how it decides fuel prices and taxes, i.e. overnight, decides it now has an issue with the Herald, triggering a series of court cases and demonstrations and international news headlines.

In Malaysia, the three alternate on a weekly basis. We either have court cases causing international headlines and demonstrations that follow, or demonstrations that causes international headlines and court cases that follow or international headlines that causes demonstrations with court cases following closely behind.

The flip flop on this also appeared to affect PAS. One day, you have everyone in PR saying in simple, unmistakable language that the non-Muslims have a right to use the banned words, and then barely a couple of months later, PAS making a V-turn (a U-turn would have been too slow) and saying in more verbose verbatim that this issue, suddenly isn’t so simple anymore.

Yet at the same time, both parties preach a message of moderation and peace and tolerance. Well, at least to the world community and international media.

You’re in then you’re out

“Pendatang” has become such a common insult among politicians to non-Malays and non-Muslims that it has more or less become a reclaimed word much like the African-Americans reclaimed “nigger”.

The final argument in any argument in politics these days appears to be “If you don’t like things here, migrate-lah.” Ironically that was probably the same line used on our forefathers when they all came here by boat to build this country.

No political party in Malaysia would be able to survive solely on the group they actually represent (given that the ideological class or race they represent is often much smaller than the ones they claim to).

Both coalitions therefore, have a delicate balancing act to deal with between the Malay-majority, conservative parties and the non-Malay-majority, arguably more liberal parties.

As such, the threat to pull out, kick out, move out from political pacts are not only bad for nation-building and race relations directly, it also seems petty and childish.

Are we in or out where it comes to important world issues like women’s and children’s rights or religious freedom?

You’re up then you’re down

There appears to be a few common flogging boys between the two parties seemingly, some real, some manufactured but all equally blown out of proportion for political mileage purposes.

The timing where these issues are played up have also become somewhat predictable – usually it signals there is some bigger issue around the bend or that a party general assembly around the corner.

The issues, in no particular order would be- Christians and the Christian Agenda, Jews and the Jewish Agenda, Chinese and the Chinese Agenda, Communists and the Communist Agenda, LGBTs and the LGBT Agenda, Liberals and the Liberal Agenda and host of other agendas involving most if not all the minority groups in the country.

You’re wrong when it’s right, it’s black and it’s white

Admitting mistakes appear to be the hardest thing for politicians to do, more so if you control the first and second most powerful parties in the country.

Often mistakes are just left to be ignored or we can just pretend they never happened. For example, Bersih or Hindraf on the part of the government, while a few commendable members came out and spoke up.

The same appears for issues like Isis. After inadvertently praising the terrorist group at an assembly, the Prime Minister smoothly condemned them a few months later. While some PAS leaders spoke out against Isis, others praised Malaysians who joined Isis, fought and died.

If you cannot even agree on a violent group like Isis, can the minorities in Malaysia expect much consistency against groups like Isma or Perkasa? Some issues are quite clear cut black and white. Too many shades of grey would just lead to much pain.

We fight, we break up, we kiss, we make up

And after every time the minorities get offended by all the above, someone in the form of the opposition leader or the prime minister will often come forward and say that’s not the official stance of either coalition.

Doesn’t really matter if the matter has been mentioned on record in front of hundreds of journalists and world leaders, all that matters is that is has been retracted and all is well again. Like a broken record, or as the song goes “the same energy, now it’s a dead battery”.

It’s sometimes really painful to hear the same song replayed again and again.

It’s almost as painful as listening to a large, empty sea vessel trudge through a rough land road.

Or in other words, replaying this over again makes parties who sing it, sound like trucking tankers. – March 10, 2015.

* This is the personal opinion of the writer or publication and does not necessarily represent the views of The Malaysian Insider.