Insecure Malaysians breed sexism

The Borobudur is a Hindu relic and yet the Muslim majority Yogjakarta folk are proud of the site. I spent my birthday weekend in Yogjakarta (more commonly known as Jogja) in Indonesia attending the third installation of the Asian Women Empowerment conference (AWE2015).

Jogja itself is an interesting city. Majority of the locals are Muslim, yet the famous Candi Borobudur and Prambanan, relics of Hindu and Buddhist culture, are historic emblems of the city.

Sure, these are tourist attractions and thus serve an economic purpose; yet there seemed to be more appreciation for these heritage sites than what I am used to in Malaysia. Jogja folk are proud of these sites, regardless of the religious history and affiliation.

The Malaysian AWE2015 team consisted of empowered women and two very brave men, while majority of the participants were local women.

I can only assume that the current state of our regional currencies prevented most from travelling, even around the South East Asian region.

The conference is the brainchild of a Korean, Juno Kim, and the first two conferences were held in Kuala Lumpur and Kota Kinabalu respectively.

The theme for AWE2015 “Empowerment in Action” was discussed through life choices, ability to travel alone as women, career development and entrepreneurship.

Talking to most participants, I found that most regional women face the common enemy of big bad patriarchy.

Some participants mention encroaching Islamic extremism, seen through curtailing the freedom of women and restrictions imposed by society on the way they dress and the way they lead their lives.

I wonder how long more can Jogja stay as a free, religious-neutral city?

Women have always had the tools to be powerful and successful in life, but we have always allowed ourselves to be held back.

I cannot be as vain as to claim all the responsibility, for society also plays a significant factor in providing the environment which hampers the development and empowerment of what makes half of the world’s population.

Look at the case of Aisyah Tajuddin, re-told through the documentary that won the Best International Feature Best Short Film at the recently concluded Freedom Film Fest, “Viral, Sial!”

The backlash received by Kupas, the weekly YouTube mockumentary by BFM and Projek Dialog was made worse through misogynistic and laden with bigotry comments directed at Aisyah for she is a woman.

Edry Faizal, the original host for Kupas, have worn the tudung in satirical clips for the mockumentary many times beforehand, and yet got off scot-free.

More recently, we saw calls by netizens for a Bank Negara scholarship winner, Hajar Nur Asyiqin Abdul Zubir, to don the tudung.

Lest we forget, our national gymnast Farah Ann Hadi also faced such comments after winning the gold medal at the recent SEA Games.

It is appalling to me that we as a society have lost the culture of saying a simple “congratulations” on others’ achievements instead.

Let us also not forget the many sexist memes of the wife of our prime minister.

It seemed to me that our insecurity as Malaysians on diverse issues are expressed through being sexist towards women. This insecurity led to disempowerment and subsequently fear.

Yet we also saw many women taking all these sexist remarks with grace. Women have led movements of change in Malaysia from Bersih 2.0 under Maria Chin Abdullah and Datuk Ambiga Sreenevasan to even the esteemed halls of Umno through the gutsy Anina Saaduddin.

Farah Ann broke the Malaysian Internet through her comeback tweet. The Malaysian women I met at AWE, notably Sharmini Hensen, overcame the challenges of life to now become one of the successful life coaches in Malaysia.

Why are we then, still insecure as Malaysians?

From “Himpunan Maruah Melayu” in red, with PAS now wanting to have a rally wearing green to complete the trio of traffic light colours with Bersih yellow; to the satirical “Himpunan Maruah India” (note to China Press: this is SATIRE) which calls for both purple and orange t-shirts – how many more rallies do we need to feel secure and empowered citizens of this fair country?

We are running out of colours in the colour wheel!

Perhaps the way forward is to challenge men through the same hardships and challenges that women face.

Removing the crutch mentality, strip off privileges, and let them do housework and take care of the children while juggling a high-flying career.

All the while keep telling them to cover up because not doing so invite rape and is a dishonour to the society at large.

I digress. Empowering a society is not an easy task, nor can it be done through a 2.5 days conference. We see our local active civil society organising many forums and dialogues in order to empower citizens of all genders. Bersih 4 was a 36-hour rally.

Yet, most of these “movements” are preaching to the converted, consisting of bi or trilingual, middle-class urbanites.

We always forget that Malaysia is bigger than Kuala Lumpur and the Peninsular, and that this country is made up of more than Malays, Chinese, and Indians ethnicities.

I urge more women to speak up on issues dear to us, and let there no longer be #allmalepanels at any civil society organised forums.

Let’s be empowered Malaysians, instead. Maybe we need a rally for that. – September 23, 2015.

* This is the personal opinion of the writer or publication and does not necessarily represent the views of The Malaysian Insider.