7 things I learned after leaving university

This week marks the seventh month of my post-university life. It’s been a turbulent ride. In a university, we know that we just have to complete our assignments, do that group projects (in which only one or two people will actually do the job), pass the exams, and all that will lead to graduation day. It’s all very concrete and stable. Once you are out of the university, you realise that Robert Frost is wrong about one thing. It’s not that there are “two roads diverged in the yellow wood” and we have to choose one out of two. There are many, many endless roads and we don’t know which or how to choose! Regardless, these are some of the things I learned while going through that transition between university and working life.

1. Everyone is trying to find their footing and we all need a period of transition

The act of throwing your graduation hat up in the air represents the sound of the starter pistol signalling the beginning of a race. As in a marathon, everyone wants to run off as quickly as they can. It can be tempting to run like they do, instead of keeping to your own pace and training plan. But is this representation itself an accurate portrayal of life? Unless you consciously resist this representation, you will be tempted to think that with each passing day being unemployed, you are “losing out” and “left behind” while others are sprinting ahead.

Alternatively, you can choose not to rush into a commitment (job, relationship, or big purchase) and take some well-deserved time off to do something you have always wanted to do. In this period of “unemployment”, you take a step back, assess, and reassess where you are, where you want to go, and whether you are going in that direction. Even after we (my seniors, friends of my batch, and myself) got a job, we constantly go through this process to evaluate our priorities and wonder whether we are doing what we want. This is my weekend coffeehouse routine. As Stephen Covey says, we need to recharge and “sharpen the saw”.

Also, from my observation, it is common that many of us are still struggling to figure out what we want...even after a year out of the university or after switching multiple jobs. And you know what? It’s fine. Totally fine.

We will also struggle to fit the new routine/company/workplace culture, especially if we have no prior exposure. I got a job after roughly two months out of university, but it took me an additional three to four months to settle into my job.

2. Everyone wants to reach the mountaintop, but in doing so, we are in danger of climbing the wrong mountain

Since we all want to reach the summit and achieve our “dream life”, we tend to sprint as fast as we can towards our goal. But one of the most insightful articles I read this year, “Climbing the wrong hill”, taught me that arduously climbing the wrong hill is worse than just sitting down and enjoying the view while figuring life out.

Sometimes while climbing a career ladder, we know that this is not something we would like to do. We know that we want to end up at the top of a different “hill” than the one we are presently climbing. But, the lure of staying on the current hill is strong and we have a natural tendency to make the next step an upward one.

For young, ambitious people, we find it hard to climb down from the current hill while everyone is seemingly taking an upward step. Maybe that is why it is so important to deliberate which hill to climb instead of rushing to climb the first hill we found, or the hill that everyone is climbing. However, sometimes we need to climb anyway so that we get a better view of which hill is higher and beautiful...which leads us to our next point.

3. The more you discover what you don’t want to do, the nearer you are to discovering what you want to do

On the opposite spectrum of immediately rushing to climb a hill, we have people who just stand still and do nothing until they are absolutely sure that they want to climb this particular hill.

Well, life doesn’t work that way, not for me at least. I wasn’t sure if I want to be an academician, policy bureaucrat, or political scientist. But I have to make a choice for my first real job. And in the midst of my job, I discover things about myself that I wouldn’t had if I did not make a move in the first place. For example, I dislike spatial and temporal restrictions. So unless it is imperative and I have no other choice, I would not take up another office hour and desk jobs again. I enjoy writing and presenting about stuff that I genuinely believe in. That certainly helps me narrow down my career choices, in good and bad ways.

4. Find the mentor(s) who will awaken the force in you

In his book “Mastery”, bestselling author Robert Greene wrote, “After your formal education, you enter the most critical phase in your life: a second, practical education known as The Apprenticeship”.

Basically he laid out three modes of apprenticeship: deep observation, skills acquisition, and experimentation. We cannot succeed or grow to our full potentials without the aid and guidance of a mentor/master. Even Luke Skywalker had Obi Wan Kenobi and Master Yoda. Identifying the mentor(s) and somehow getting them to take you under their wing can be a delicate process, unexpected even.

But as the saying goes, when the student is ready, the master will appear. Since I am plunged into the working world, I have undeservedly benefited from the opportunities and trust from three individuals: Wong Chin Huat, Amir Muhammad, and Fuad Rahmat. I would not be doing what I am doing without their faith in me.

5. Happiness is not everything

Sometimes when I am contemplating something, my dad will come to me and ask “What’s wrong? What are you thinking about?”

It seems that when someone is fretting or bothered by something, we immediately assume that something is wrong and he/she is unhappy. I know happiness is important. But I don’t want to be just happy. I want to work intensely at something, to feel deeply the many shades of life, and to do something great, whatever that means.

I am thinking of a book. You know, with a great book, even after you pass on, you will never really die. There will always be people reading your book, and your book will be in the shelf of the great libraries. That’s what I have in mind, currently. People who don’t understand think that writers are wasting time and energy writing something when they should be chasing wealth and prosperity. But it’s not that we are not ambitious. We are overly ambitious. A writer not only leaves a legacy, but he/she also obtain something which lasts longer than wealth:  immortality.

6. University is temporary, education is forever

You may have graduated from university, but you have not graduated from learning. You never will, until you decide to stop learning.

Indeed, one of the most risky habits that university graduates can develop is to stop learning something new, quit educating ourselves, and quit actively seeking something to learn (and follow through). You can read classic books (after all, they must have something good in them to last decades, hundreds, or even thousands of years), educational magazines, websites with a good collection of articles (my preference is Medium.com), and of course, make good use of YouTube and your smart gadgets.

There are many platforms currently offering free online courses. You can learn from professors and experts who are the best in their field, without paying a ringgit. You can even design a self-taught syllabus or course. YouTube. Keep on learning, because you are either green and growing, or ripe and rotting.

7. No one is in a better position than you to take charge of your life

No one will deliberately and consciously plan and care about your life, unless you do. In spite of what other people is doing or what your parents tell you, only you know how to live your life the way you want it to be. In order to flourish (Aristotle's term for it was “eudaimonia”), you have to achieve excellence. How to achieve it and in what areas you can be excellent at, only you know. Maybe you already know it, but you are afraid of your potential. As Paulo Coelho says, “the universe conspires to help the dreamer”. – December 19, 2015.

* This is the personal opinion of the writer or publication and does not necessarily represent the views of The Malaysian Insider.